“I had a teacher at school who told me once that I was a mistress of self-reinvention. I didn’t know what he was on about at the time, I thought he was putting me on, but I’ve since come to like the idea. Runaway, lover, wife, waitress, gallery manager, nanny, and a few more in between. So who do I want to be tomorrow?”
If you weren’t already aware, this quote is from The Girl On The Train–a fucked up movie and book that intrigues me in more way than one. I like people who are tainted, like Rachel and Megan. I like plot twists. I like raw emotion. I love when people are drunk and crying and cannot be anything but honest in that moment. I fall in love with people and their honest moments all the time. Because “normal” bores me. It lacks depth and completely fails to capture my attention. This particular quote speaks volumes to me. I like the idea that I can choose to be whoever I want to be, whenever I want. I’ve always hated labels, probably because I’ll never fit into one. I like to try on different hats and take them off when they no longer suit me. I’m not afraid to close doors or start over. Perhaps I like this freedom a little too much. But this is also why I know that I will overcome this eating disorder. One that has tied me down for far too long. It’s suffocating and I prefer to be free, committed only to the next version of myself. So who do I want to be tomorrow? I’ll let you know.